Friday, April 30, 2010

Roller-Coaster Ride From Hell

This has been some kind of week; it's like the cosmic floodgates of crazy opened wide and unleashed a deluge, nearly drowning us in bizarre behavior and really bad things. I know that Mercury is in one of its frequent, damnable retrogrades until May 13, and that usually means strangeness and perversity will prevail, but Mercury must be retrograding itself clean out of the Solar System because tons of weird shit have been happening all over.

Oh, speaking of "shit", we heard that word, or variations of it, echoing off the august alabaster walls of Congress as Senate hearings into the vile machinations of Wall Street raged on for five hours. The leaders of various financial firms got their buns raked over the coals by angry Senators, but they must have been wearing asbestos underwear because they didn't seem to be much phased by the whole ordeal. Maybe when you know you're making 50 million dollars this year you don't need to take some crotchety old man with a gavel seriously. I think that Wall Streeters know that their lobbying money has bought them protection from any meaningful reform, especially because the people trying to navigate the country out of the crippling, damaging recession are the very same people who caused it. So they don't have anything to worry about.

Very disturbing story about an environmental catastrophe unfolding in the Gulf of Mexico as a British Petroleum oil rig spews over 200,000 gallons of crude oil a day into the rich seafood beds and delicate wetlands ecosystem off the Louisiana coast, a truly special and unique part of the world that can't seem to catch a break when it comes to natural disasters. I wonder where that shithead Sarah Palin is now - we don't seem to be hearing a lot from her on one of her favorite subjects, offshore drilling. Who can forget her childish, simplistic chant of "Drill, baby, drill" at last summer's Republican convention, and the sight of all those wrinkled, pinched faces of the dessicated old people madly cheering her on. If I could, I would ask her, "Hey Sarah, how's that drilly-spilly thing working for you?" We'll see how far offshore drilling goes now.

And we're having our own shitstorm here in Arizona, as the whole nation goes ape shit (yes, I'm going to use that word as much as I can, while I can). The local news shows babble on breathlessly about the economic "backlash" this bill will cause us. In sonorous tones they announce the conventions that are being canceled left and right. The first convention canceled was for some immigration lawyers' group, so that wasn't exactly a horrible shock. But hotel owners are already declaring Armageddon and claim to be teetering on the edge of ruin. Various big-city governments, most notably San Francisco, Dallas and New York, have cut business ties with our fair state. But we've seen this before - Arizona caught all kinds of crap when it refused to honor Martin Luther King. Despite all the dire predictions, over 60% of Arizonans approve of the new law and Governor-Without-A-Mandate Jan Brewer's approval rating has gone up around 15 percentage points. What does that say about us, that we somehow invite and look forward to economic ruin? I guess this little psychodrama has to play itself out and by next week everybody will have moved on to the next manufactured crisis, and life here will return to relative normalcy. People have very short memories, especially when it comes to disasters.

I hope we can get some rest this weekend and nothing awful happens for a couple of days, at least. It would be just our luck that some flashpoint in the world will pop off, like North Korea or Iran, and all of a sudden everybody's attention will go over there. Either that or some dimwitted Hollywood starlet will make another public appearance without panties or someone will uncover a nest of 50 new Tiger Woods mistresses or some shameless trollop will parade around in a bikini with Nazi tattoos on her butt. And everyone will be interested in that.

Mercury, give us a break and un-retrograde yourself. We can't stand much more of this cosmic craziness.

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